Thursday, November 17, 2016

70 degrees in Mid-November.

This weather is just wonderful. I had most of the day to myself. Went for eyebrow wax/tint (Holy crap - cost $60) Had what was probably my DQ cone for the season.

Didn't obsess too much about politics. Just kind of watching the clown assemble his cabinet. Not gonna be a easy 4 years, that's for sure.

Let it go.

Jeff golfed. How could he not. It was 70 degrees out today.

Reading a bio of Eleanor Roosevelt (covering 1939-till her death). Puts what were going through now into perspective. As first lady, she was resolute in her conviction to helping the refugees fleeing Europe. She received regular updates from friends in Europe about the atrocities being committed by Hitler. Entire towns being bombed and it's inhabitants being killed or forced to flee; but to where? One by one, countries (Norway, Denmark, Switzerland, France) being overtaken by Nazi forces. The entire world was on fire and FDR was maneuvering his way through the nightmare that the USA would eventually be drawn into. I can't imagine the terror and feelings of hopelessness.

I think I can survive 4 years of Trump. (But, I fear that unless we make some serious changes, our country is in for decades of diminished influence world wide and continued hardship for all citizens of the USA..

But, I finished the day playing with Maddox before putting him to bed. Then, I went out and sat on the back porch and stared at the moon and the stars. Perspective.


Been told I'm catastrophizing about the election. Actually listened to a clinical psychologist's podcast that used the word. I'm pretty sure it's NOT really a word but when you see it or say know exactly what it means.

And yes, I am taking the outcome of the election and elevating the possibilities into probabilities. I wake up in the middle of the night and check the news. I can't bear to see Trump on television or hear his voice. Pretty sure it's at obsession level.

So, I followed the doctor's advice. Just stop. STOP. Stop twitter. Stay off social media for the time being. Finally, get outside. Just take a walk. Do anything.

So I went golfing. But, I don't golf.

Tuesday, November 15, 2016

There's a story here.

Arthur Miller, speaking about 222 W. 23rd Street - Chelsea Hotel.

"No vacuum cleaners. No rules. No shame."

I get it. 😉

Didn't know anything about the history of the building.

Thanks Leonard. This helps.

Obviously, I'm still trying to deal with the recent election.

"The only moment that you can live here comfortably in these absolutely irreconcilable conflicts is in this moment when you embrace it all and you say "Look, I don’t understand a fucking thing at all – Hallelujah!”

Leonard Cohen

Monday, November 14, 2016

It's been 3 years........

I had a hard time finding my blog. It's been so long. And, I'm gonna be honest...........I CANNOT believe it's been 3 years since I posted.

But, everything is different now.

Last week, an sociopath was elected as our President. I'm speechless. I'm angry. I'm depressed. I feel fearful of the future; for the first time in my fifty-seven years.

Everyone is asking themselves, "How did this happen?" I have no fucking idea.

I'm not sure when I'll be able to watch the news again. I have never felt such visceral hatred towards another human being. This is new for me.

All I want to do here, on this blog, is express my fears and all my feelings about what has happened to our country and what may lie ahead for us all.

And, I need to address that word I used above; HATRED. I want to be able to take that word back someday, sooner rather than later. I know it's not good for my psyche or my soul.

2016 has been a HORRIBLE year. We lost some of my favorite artists this year. We lost Prince (to accidental overdose), we lost David Bowie (to cancer), we lost Glen Frey (to complications of RA), we lost Leonard Cohen (to cancer). I just read that Gwen Ifill died today of cancer. Goddamn cancer. She was a veteran Washington journalist who helped me navigate my way through this horrible election. She was only sixty-one.

But we did have one amazing experience this year. Finally, in 2016, the Chicago Cubs won the world series. The last time this happened was 1908. Dan and Collin were able to get into a few of the games at Wrigley and they had the time of their lives.

But, the joy of that win was overshadowed by what was going on in politics. The Cubs won on a Friday, and the following Tuesday, Trump won the election.

(Memory: Maddox spent the day here with Jeff and I. Dan lives with us now and we are thrilled to be a regular part of Maddox's life. We went shopping for a lawn ornament (pic)
for what will be his 2nd Christmas. He is the joy of our life right now. But, now I am extra fearful for well as for the future of our country.

Wednesday, November 27, 2013


Starting moment. Seriously. I give up. I'm giving in. It's the day before Thanksgiving, and like you, I have a million things to do in order to welcome a houseful of guests tomorrow.

I know the drill. After all, I've done this for the past 30 years and I've always enjoyed it. But, over the last few years, I've enjoyed it less. My brain is tired. Having been diagnosed with MS in 2000, I find the constant movement, the heightened noise, the overall increased stimulii getting to me.

All six of my adult children (none married - that's another post) are coming, starting at 10:30 am. I can't wait to see them. I'm sure it will be a wonderful day. At least, I know it could be all that I hope for. But, there's one thing I'm doing this year that I believe will assure that it is my best Thanksgiving ever............I mean EVER.

I'm giving in!

I'm letting my husband do everything. And, I mean everything. He's been asking, almost begging to take over. Since the beginning of November, he has tried to talk me into just sitting back and letting him handle the Holiday. Why have I resisted? What the hell is wrong with me?

Sure, he will do things differently. He's going to turn the huge 25 lb. turkey w/ my traditional sage/walnut dressing (he yawns when we talk about it) into his own turkey rouladen with an entirely new dressing recipe rolled into the turkey breast, tied with string and baked. He's going to make a shrimp appetizer, stuffed mushrooms, and a few other items.

He really is a great cook. Always has been. Me? Not so much. Just average. He says I "cook" but, not in the kitchen. He's hysterical. Who is he talking about?

So, the kitchen is officially his for Thanksgiving. Go ahead baby, impress me. Impress us all. I'm giving up. And, it's about time.

Now what do I do?

Wednesday, October 9, 2013

Messages Along the Way......

Most mornings, I take a walk at the bird sanctuary acroos the street from where we live. They have a beautiful trail that weaves through many different types of tall grasses with intermittant blooms of flowers (depending on the season). The path goes for about 2 or 3 miles and along the way there are several small benches. Normally, I don't take any breaks during my walk, as my intention is to work up a good sweat and call it my exercise for the day. But today, my cell phone started ringing and I saw that my daughter was trying to Skype me. Since she is living in Spain this year (teaching English) and I look forward to her calls, I answered. Rather then walk and talk, I sat down on one of the benches along the way. As I was talking to my daughter, my eye caught site of a shiny object on the corner of the  bench. On the bench sat this shiny, white, flat rock and, written in pink marker was the following: "You already know."
 Further down the trail, I found another rock. This one says, "it's time for a new story."

What an amazing idea. Who is this person that actually thought this up and took the time to strategically place these rocks with messages along the trail? I wish I knew.  Because, I would like to thank this anonymous person. You brought me joy. You made my day.